I have struggled for some time, not understanding or knowing why. I have an amazing family that supports me and prays for me (friends too :). Thank you and I love you.
I am so thankful and blessed to have such an awesome God. He knows my heart and gives me just what I am desiring. I want a pure heart. I want to be a wife who God intended her to be. I want to be a mother who teaches her children about the amazing grace of God and spreads His truth. I want to be a woman who strives to live her days allowing God to work through her. He has chosen to give me a renewing of my heart and soul. I was tired, weary and discouraged. He picked me up and embraced me in His arms. He held me until I was strong enough to stand on my feet again. As I write this, tears stream down my face, tears of joy and thankfulness. I am so undeserving yet he has always been there...waiting for me. In the past few years, I felt God working in ways I didn't understand. Though my circumstances were difficult for me at times, I know he used them in ways I don't even know. His plan is so amazing. The very circumstances I resented, are the exact circumstances that brought me to where I am today, at peace with myself but most importantly at peace with Him. I am who I was made to be. I embrace this woman you made and promise to protect her, nurture her and love her. Thank you Lord for your tender love and patience. I know I will fail you but I promise to give you all of me, the good and the bad.
Well said Sara! I think all of us feel that way to some extent. Sometimes I look at other people's circumstances and wish for them, but that's not necessarily what God wants for me. He gives us exactly what he wants for us! Sometimes I don't see it until a certain situation has passed. Thanks for the words of encouragement!
Posted by: hannah | November 24, 2008 at 11:58 AM
sounds like you have been through a lot. unfortunately most of the time we won't know, this side of heaven, why god allows us to go through things but we can hold on to him knowing that he knows what is best for us. thanks for sharing your heart. it was good to hear from you.
Posted by: jen smith | November 24, 2008 at 01:45 PM
I Peter 1:6-9 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7.These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8.Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9. for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your soul. I love you Sara with all my heart & lift you up to the God that gave you to me.
Posted by: mom | November 24, 2008 at 01:59 PM
Thanks for sharing your heart. You are encouraging me through your words.
Posted by: Jodi | November 24, 2008 at 09:39 PM
Dear sweet Sara. You bear your soul so all of us who love you can know where you have been and where you want to be. I, too, have tears in my eyes. You are such a beautiful person inside and out. I know God will hold you close. He knows your heart. We love you and Dusty and pray your struggles will be few and your blessings be overflowing.
Posted by: Mom B | November 25, 2008 at 07:41 AM
Sarah, it's good to hear what is in your heart. You guys are always in our prayers. God is so wonderful to all of us, I pray that he will keep you and your family bless with grace and healthy as always.
Posted by: Rachell | November 25, 2008 at 01:52 PM
So good Sara! What an encouragement to me today. Thank you so much for sharing your heart. You are one amazing woman and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. Sometimes I look at the circumstances God brings you through and wonder how you do it. You are strong because of the Lord. I know you may not always feel that way, but He is your comforter and gives you the energy and strength from day to day. You are an example to so many around you. I love you and am privileged to have you as my sister!
Posted by: Chris | November 25, 2008 at 02:28 PM
I know things have been hard for you for a long time. I've been praying for you and will continue to do so. God will bless you for your patience and your honoring Him. I pray the blessings will be poured out to you. You deserve it. I love you!
Posted by: Jen K | November 25, 2008 at 02:47 PM
next time make sure you let me know to have the tissue ready :o). i, too, have tears as i read this. im so blessed to have you in my life and admire your will to always keep on!! love you.
Posted by: j-lo | November 26, 2008 at 08:30 AM